My sister and my mom

In 1968 my sister died violently at 4 months old. She was thrown on a couch and watched as she bounced on the floor repeated by my biological father. This bastard of a man knocked my mother unconcious when she tried to stop him and from there no one knows what he did to my sister. The final outcome was that when my mom came to my sister was dead and propped up sitting on the couch. My mom has never gotten over the trauma of all of this. She still gets horribly depressed every July which is when my sister was born and again every November which is when my sister died.

Unfortunately this year my mom is taking this out on me. I can't afford to drive to her house to be with her so she is telling me I don't care about her and she wishes she was dead and so on. I just don't know what to do. I call her every day sometimes as much as three times in a day. I just can't be there for her the way she wants me to. Add to that the fact that my aunt got really nasty with her about picking up my grandma again and things are not going well. I really wish my aunt would keep her damn mouth shut this time of the year. She knows what my mom is going through and all she cares about is getting my grandma out of the house so she can go do whatever she wants to do. Granted it is a lot to have to take care of my grandma 24/7 but my mom is also going through a lot right now. I jsut wish my mom would go and get some therapy and try to work through this instead of letting it control her every year.

I have had to deal with this every year of my life even as a young child. I understand her being upset, but she could get help or at least talk to me instead of shutting me out because I am not coming to her house. She needs more help than I can give her to be honest but I try to be supportive and loving even though she tells me I don't care about her. I just don't know what else to do for her.