Hospitals.........Grrrrrrrrrr

So last night we spent 7 1/2 hours in the hospital because Bill went numb in both legs and had to miss a doctor's appointment. It was crazy. They did a bizillion blood tests, urine test, MRI and looked at the results of his last x-ray. They said there was nothing they could do for him and sent him home. It took 7 1/2 hours for that. How stupid can they really be? I would hope that if there were ever a real emergency they would look closer at it than what last night showed. The poor kids were going nuts waiting around.....although I will say they behaved very well. Bill became an obnoxious ass waiting around. I really hate it when he has to wait like that because he becomes down right beligerent. He is not a kind person at times like that. Sometimes I wonder how he could be the same person I married.

On the other hand though at least the numbness was documented for once. Otherwise the only documentation of it that we have is the book we write it in. I think that's why Bill hasn't gotten his SSI yet. There is not enough proof that he is having these problems. I wish he would understand that we need the proof of it happening but he just says it's a waste of time. I agree it's a pain in the ass to sit in the hospital, but the more proof we have of this happening the better. I just wish we could go in every time that it happens but our insurance wouldn't allow for that. As it is Bill has been having numbness in his entire right leg, back, part of the left leg and his right hand today. That was all at one time........not separate parts of the body throughout the day. It really sucks. I had to make him go to bed and lay down for awhile. That was at 7:30 and he's still in bed at 10:19. I guess he really needed the rest or else the numbness is still there. I know when I checked on him at 9:30 he was sleeping, but when I woke him he said he was still numb. So I guess for now I just have to keep checking on him and making sure he is all right for the time being. Sometimes the numbness takes six to eight hours to go away. During that time he is completely useless. The numb body parts don't function properly and often won't move. Try getting a 280 pound man from one room to the next when his leg won't move properly. I sure as hell can't carry him, but Roy and I together have had to carry him more than once now. I've even had the neighbor help me get him back in the house because he went outside to do something and went numb out there. Now he doesn't trust going outside much at all. I personally think he is highly embarrassed that the neighbor has helped get him back in the house or that he has had to sit outside for hours doing nothing but waiting for the numbness to go away because I couldn't get him in the house alone.

Today I am just thankful that Roy was home with Bill while I went grocery shopping. What would have happened to the two little ones if Bill went numb and he was here alone with them? They could have gotten outside and gotten hurt and he wouldn't have been able to do anything about it. At least now that I have a cell phone he keeps the house phone right next to him when I am gone and will call me the moment he starts to feel funny at all. That way I can run home to be with him and make sure he is all right and so are the kids. Before I had my cell phone I didn't go anywhere without my kids because I just couldn't trust that something wouldn't happen when he was here with the kids. Now I feel like I have a little bit of freedom. Before I felt trapped and smothered. Now I at least get a little bit of time to myself. I need that once in awhile. When I am with the kids non-stop for weeks on end I start to feel too stressed out and I don't do well anymore with that. I need at least a couple of hours to myself once in a while even if it is just to go grocery shopping. It leaves me feeling less stressed and much more able to deal with my kiddos.